GTK, C and More

Ah…the trials of having programmed mostly in C++/Java. After the cleanliness and frankly the commonsense of how a lot of that API is laid out – the GTK API is just…odd. Perhaps the key word is confusing. I’m not sure how everything fits together with each other. Since this is a C toolkit and inheritance doesn’t take place (its aggregation AFAIR) somethings are just…um…weird. Talked very briefly to Jeroen about Anjuta2. I tried a bit of programming today. The weirdness with GTK didn’t help me. I retreated to my cave and sat down. Haha. Sat. He sat on the mat staring at the cat waiting for the rat to gorge itself and become fat and crawl up the bat without getting stung by the gnat. Bad gnat. Interesting…the more I watch Fight Club, the more I understand it. Or, perhaps I’m reading too much into it. What do you think mmkay? Whatever – interesting disassociation of the person into two separate individuals. I found it particularly striking that Tyler Durden was everything that…Jack…wanted to be – but wasn’t. Yeah. I understand that. It is hard sometimes. Why woud Tyler create a loser personality for himself? No one wants to create a loser personality – no one. Because it is useless. I find myself typing and I don’t think anyone is listening. Blah Blah go my words but no one listens. Just like real life. But in all fairness I do not invite listening. My very attitude puts listeners off. I tend not to be open or communicative. Weird, because I am an *extremely* good listener. Do you know what “Du reischst so gut” means? It means “You smell so good”. I was thinking about buying a CD/mp3 player for Christmas. Unfortunately, it costs 128 dollars and that will be quite a bit after tax. So I don’t think I’ll get myself any presents for Christams. Odd huh – I’m getting myself presents? Not really. Actually normal. Going to London tomorrow to see Western. Yeah. Go Western. Thankfully I have one book left. Gonna have to burn through that. Sometimes I wish. I wish things were different. I wish especially one thing was different. But I know it won’t happen although I think about it almost every day. I don’t know why I keep thinking (obsessing?) over it when it’ll take place around 5 years from now… Maybe its just me. The way I am. The way I always was and the way I will be. I know I can change though. But maybe nothing matters for this. I know it won’t matter. Nothing matters. Je suis fini.